King City, CA : Woman Abused Mother With Dementia Is Going To Prison For 15 Years : View From A Private Duty Caregiver
Article by Richard Kuehn
King City, CA : Woman Abused Mother With Dementia Is Going To Prison For 15 Years : View From A Private Duty Caregiver Serving Carmel, Carmel Valley, Carmel-by-the-Sea, Gilroy, Gonzalez, Greenfield, Hollister, King City, Marina, Monterey, Pacific Grove, Pebble Beach, Salinas, San Juan Bautista, Seaside And Soledad California
The front page of the Monterey Herald today told the unfortunate story of a 65-year old woman who couldn’t deal with the stress of caring for her 96-year old mother who suffered from dementia and ended up in prison. There is no doubt that caring for a loved one with dementia or Alzheimer’s disease can cause intense stress, but the judge threw the book at this woman in large part because she didn’t seek any outside help. If you are dealing with stress from caring for a loved one, please contact the Alzheimer’s Association. They are a wonderful organization which has support groups, a 24 hour hot line at 800-272-3900, and many other resources to help those suffering from Alzheimer’s disease as well as their friends and family so they can better understand and deal with the disease. For this 65-year old Pacific Grove woman, it’s too late. Her mother had an active social and volunteer life in her church well into her 90′s. However, she allowed her daughter and son-in-law to move in with them after they suffered from financial problems, but the big problems started after the daughter’s husband died in 2009. She then began isolating her mother from friends and neighbors, which is the worst possible thing for the elderly. Without social stimulation, it’s much easier for the mind to deteriorate more quickly. What happened subsequent to that is unknown, but it didn’t end well for anyone involved. On September 24, 2009 the police found the emaciated 96-year old woman on the floor unconscious, bruised and bleeding. She died two hours later at the Community Hospital of the Monterey Peninsula (CHOMP). Her autopsy showed she had both new and healing injuries. The daughter acknowledged responsibility for her mother’s injuries from the time she called 911 and was able to negotiate a plea bargain and accept a guilty charge of manslaughter rather than first degree murder. She asked the judge for leniency because of her advanced age and because her mother was “difficult to deal with and suffering from dementia”. That’s no excuse. In imposing a 15-year sentence, Judge Adriene Grover said that if a child were acting up and showing no gratitude for her care, “We would not give a parent a pass for neglecting that child. A person suffering from dementia should be viewed the same as a child,” said Judge Grover. Those suffering from dementia go through many stages, from very quiet, to loud and argumentative, to reverting to their childhood. Without help, this is indeed very difficult to deal with. I cared for my grandmother who had Alzheimer’s disease until she passed away at the age of 97 in January and I saw many stages of the disease. Please, if you are caring for someone with dementia, don’t shut yourself in and try to deal with this alone. Seek outside help from friends, family, the Alzheimer’s Association and other support groups so you can talk through the issues you are having. http://www.montereyherald.com/local/ci_19246221http://www.alz.org/norcal/
About the Author
About Richard Kuehn & Family inHome Caregiving of Monterey:After more than a decade of caregiving, both in a professional environment and for a 97 year old family member I was dissatisfied with service from local caregiving agencies. I became convinced of the need for a service which provides very personal assistance to the elderly and founded Family inHome Caregiving serving the Monterey Peninsula. Please visit my blog where I talk about important senior issues at:http://www.familyinhomecaregiving.com/Blog